Coffee Fest Reviews

Being located outside the cinemas is a fine place to learn about what's good at the Box Office. That's why we have created a new segment on our blog, dedicated to giving you a run-down of all the latest movies. These reviews are primarily based on a vox pop of a large number of our customers....so enjoy.

Inside Out: Have the tissues handy. This one is a real tear-jerker, especially for the adults! Great for all ages. 5 Stars.

Entourage (MA15+): Don't even bother. Not one good review. 0 Stars.

Far From the madding crowd (M): Just wonderful. It is rare to find a re-make that is on-par with the original, but this movie does it. This one is more for the ladies, or 'if you're into that type of thing.' 4 Stars.

Jurassic Park (M): In-your-face-action, you will come out roaring...like most of our customers did. Great special  effects with rave reviews. Don't listen to the 'expert' reviews...Claire Dearing killing dinosaurs in heels is cool. If you don't take it too seriously, you will love it! 5 Stars.

Pitch Perfect 2 (M).  Great for a laugh. Some liked it better than the first. 4.5 Stars.

Ted. (MA15+) Naughty. Good for a 'snicker'. 3 stars.

Minions: We here at Coffee Fest have Minion Fever...and have actually seen this one! If you like us, you will like Minions because they are crazy and bad, just like us.You will not be disappointed for forking out mullah to see it. Great for all ages. 6 out of 5!!

Five Minutes With...

Tristan Kitson

Tristan.  The big Aussie. Coffee Fest wouldn't be the same without him. 

He brings comedy to your coffee... Where

Coffee Fest is his stage and his customers,  merely players (thanks Shakespeare).

He boasts a brazen attitude that demands respect. Yet, his innate quality to treat everyone from all walks of life as equal, makes him the most amicable barista around. 


So Tristan.

What's the best thing about being tall?

I can reach the top shelf for ya!

LOL and change lightbulbs without a chair...

What everyone wants to know...Do you play basketball? LOL

Nah, I cant dribble.

What's the greatest thing about being Australian?

Living in Australia!


Give me your best Aussie slang!

No wuckers mate!



Describe your perfect day.

Any day I get a coffee a meal a place to sleep and to see my wife and kids.

Listening or talking?

Depends who's doing which!

Would you want to travel in the past, or the future -why?

The future because I'd love to see how it all plays out.

What's the best lesson you have learnt...and how did you learn it?

My grandfather used to always say "be kind to one another" you cant beat that kind of wisdom.

Sunrise or sunset?

After watching the sunset, party all night until the sun comes up.....then go to work. You know it!




Love it!

What's the best way to your heart?

Through my veins.

If you were in a movie, what would your character be?

The trusty side kick of course.

What's your favourite saying?

The whole world is a stage, all the men and women are merely players.

Have you ever invented a unique food or drink?

Coffee, but it was in a past life. Long story.

Are you superstitious? If so,What's your biggest superstition.

 I believe in Karma.

If you came with a warning label, what would it say?

Take me seriously at your own peril

What would you ask your future self?

How the hell did we end up in the same room together?!

What's the best thing about having kids?

I finally have some people that I can relate to that are on the same level as me! Kids are the truth and I love the truth.


Lastly, what's the best joke you have ever told?

What happened to the tiny man who got stuck in a milk bottle.
Nothing he got out and he was all white......


(He made that up).

Women's Petition Against Coffee 1674.

This Did Happen...

Photo Reference: http://houghtonlib.tumblr.com/post/81065581585/the-womens-petition-against-coffee-representing

Coffee causes men to gossip and makes them impotent....well that's what several thousand 'Buxome good women...' declared in 1664 when their men started to frequent coffeehouses instead of maintaining their duties at home.

Coffee had been popularised in England from the 1650s. Previously ale-houses were the common social ground. Yet, this exotic beverage caught the interest of scholars: coffeehouses became part of the public sphere. Men came together to discuss politics; business; the meaning of life...and to get away from women! Although women were allowed in the coffeehouse, no self-respecting women would dare enter.

In a petition against coffee, the women described their suffering. Not only now were their men drunk at night: they were drunk all day! After hefty discussion the women decided that the falling birth rate was attributed to '...nothing more than the Excessive use of that Newfangled, Abominable, Heathenish Liquor called COFFEE...'

Women were outraged that their men no longer made love to them nine times a night and felt that this foreign liquor was decaying the 'true Old English Vigour:' It trifled their time, scalded their chops and took away their money!

As if this wasn't enough, they were concerned that men would overtake women in talkativeness. Stating they were becoming jealous towards the fact that men were taking a quality that was inherently a woman's!

...'they sup muddy water, and murmur insignificant notes till half a dozen of them out-babble an equal number of us at a Gossipping, talking all at once in Confusion, and running from point to point...'

In their response, the men could not believe the women's complaint.  Stating 'Our Island is a Paradise for Women.' They declared that coffee gave them more vigour in the bedroom and coffeehouses were a respite from their insufferable women! Ending their retort with, 'Soloman was right, when he told us that the grave and the Womb were equally Insatiable.'

Thankfully, the petition had no effect...and centuries later, coffee can be enjoyed by everyone: in fabulous coffeehouses like Coffee Fest!

Want to know more?

You can read the full text here:

Women's Petition:

http://www.gopetition.com/famous-petitions-in-history/232/the-women-s-petition-against-coffee-1674.html

Men's Response:

.https://www.staff.uni-giessen.de/gloning/tx/mens-answer-1674.htm

The Secret to our Kamikaze slice REVEALED!

KAMIKAZE SLICE

The 'Kamikaze' is inspired by the caramel slice and chocolate brownie, with a nutty twist...Why not combine the best of both worlds? It has a rich brownie base, topped with caramel sauce and sprinkled with peanuts: as it's name suggests, it is an explosion of flavour and absolutely dangerous!

Coffee Fest bakes a few of your favourie slices, including the 'Kamikaze,' which is a unique creation of Coffee Fest's. We are often asked for the recipe... and up until now it has been our little secret. But this week we thought we would share our 'Kamikaze' recipe, so you too can be a smash hit at your next morning tea...

Ingredients: (Makes 16)

Base:

200g Premium Dark Cooking Chocolate.

200g Cooking Butter

1 1/2 Cups Castor Sugar

1/3 Cup Cocoa

3 eggs

1/2 Cup Plain Flour

1/4 Cup Self Raising Flour

1 Teaspoon Baking Powder

180g White Chocolate chopped (or buttons).

1 Cup Walnuts.

Filling:

2 tins (397g each) of Sweetened Condensed Milk

100g Butter

2 Tablespoons Golden Syrup.

Topping:

150g crushed Peanuts (found in the bake section of your supermarket).

Method:

Part One:

Step 1).

Line a slice tray with grease proof paper and set oven at 170 degrees Celsius.

Step 2). 

Melt 200g butter and 200g good quality dark cooking chocolate. This can be done in the microwave oven by heating for 20-30 seconds and stir. The chocolate will melt in warmth of butter. Be careful not to over heat. Alternatively simmer water on a stove and place the bowl on top to melt the ingredients.

Step 3).

Add Castor sugar to the warm chocolate mixture and mix till dissolved.

Step 4).

Add cocoa to warm chocolate mixture and stir through.

Step 5).

Add eggs and stir through.

Step 6).

Chop white chocolate and walnuts and add these to the mixture.

Step 7).

In a separate bowl sift the flours and baking powder.

Step 8).

Add the flour mixture into the chocolate mixture. Carefully fold it through until combined. Don't over mix: this will keep the texture of the base lovely and soft and it will rise nicely.

Step 9).

Place mixture evenly into greased baking tray.

Step 10).

Place in the middle of the oven and allow to cook for approximately 45 minutes/ when a skewer comes away clean. Allow to cool to room temperature before beginning Part Two. (If you are time poor, you can put the slice in the freezer to cool quickly and go straight to part two).

Part Two

Step 1). 

Melt Butter on stove and then add condensed milk and golden syrup.

Step 2).

Allow this to thicken on stove on a low heat. Stir continuosly. Be careful not to let the mixture catch as this will result in hard toffee-like pieces.

Step 3).

Add the caramel mixture to the brownie base and place back into the oven. Cook for about 10 minutes or until you see the edges begin to caramalise.

Step 4).

Bring out of oven and add the peanuts on top. Allow to cool in the fridge before cutting.

Step 5).

NOM, NOM, NOM!

Alternatively......This Slice is AVAILABLE TODAY!! Enjoy it with your favourite espresso. xxx

Five Minutes With...

Bo Kiss

 

 

He is the little guy you can hear, but can't see from behind the coffee machine: but don't let his stature fool you. Bo is a machine....originally a chef- his talent lies in the kitchen-but we here at Coffee Fest enjoy having his skills and lively personality front-of-house.

YOUR TURN JANGLES!

HA, OMG!

Were you named after anyone?

No I wasn't .. Bo Kiss is as unique as it gets.

Do you have any interesting family history?

I've thought long and hard about this question .. And the answer is .. I can't really think of anything :)

Morning or night?

Definitely not morning!

What's your life motto?

If one day speed kills me , do not cry , because I was smiling

Speaking of speed.... What's the fastest you have been in a car? (driver or passenger?)

Driver, at 228 Kms per hour at Eastern Creek down the main straight .........I mean on Epping Road........Haha nah Jokes

What's the first thing you notice about people?

 

Their face , Hahahahaha

Ham/cheese toasty or cheese/tomato toasty?

 Ham , cheese , tomato..... and French mustard

If you were on death-row, what would you request for your final meal?

 A hunger deal from MacDonald's.

What's your favourite sport?

Ice hockey and basketball . They're my main two sports .... But I'm an all rounder in every sport .. But I can't stand sports where people fake that their hurt , like soccer

Have you ever accidentally injured somebody? How?

No , I'm always the one getting injured , being the little guy.

Who would you want on your side in a fight: famous or otherwise?

Tristan Kitson would be my first choice .. He would say something funny and they would all drop to the floor

Holden or Commodore?

They're the same thing Amy , haha . Woman and cars ! Lol

ROFL, I meant Holden or Ford.... lololololo

Too late Amy , you have to out that down . That's a classic.

So, is it Holden or Ford anyway?

Nahh , you've gotta put down .. Holden or Commodore ! Hahaha

 

PlayStation or Xbox?

I would say Xbox.

 

Is there a childhood toy you wish you still had?

I had a huge book of board games... where you would open up and flick through, it had like 10 games in it ...And it was like a metre long...They don't make stuff like they used to.

If you could ask your future self something, what would it be?

Probably the other way around...... and the future self would say to the present self .... What the hell were you thinking all these years!

 

Thanks Bo...and thanks for teaching me the difference between Holden and Commodore...I mean, Ford ;)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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10 Things you didn't know about Coffee Fests Coveted Cakes...

 

1) Chocolate Kahula Dome

The Dome or 'Zuccoto' Cake, meaning 'little pumpkin' is thought to be inspired by the Dome of Florence: the cities main cathedral.

 

2) Rocky Road: 'Something to Smile About'

 

Rocky Road was created during The Great Depression and named to give customers something to smile about, in their hard (or rocky) life.

 

3.) Red Velvet Cupcake

Popularised by the movie 'Stealing Magnolias.' This moist cake gets it's colour through a chemical reaction between the alkaline - baking soda- and the acidic- buttermilk, cocoa and vinegar.

4.) Tiramasu

Tiramasu can be translated to 'pick me up.'  So called by courtesans, who used it before meeting with lovers as a stimulant and aphrodisiac!

 

5.) Cannoli

 

 

 

Originating from the Middle Ages and thought to be a symbol of fertility. Cannoli derives from 'Canna' which is a cane-like reed. Historically their shape was formed using sugar cane as a mould.

6.) Macaron's.

Macaron's were popularised in 1792 during the French Revolution by two Carmelite nuns seeking asylum. They baked and sold macaron's to support themselves. They became known as the 'Macaron Sisters'

7.) Lemon Meringue Pie

Paleo lovers rejoice! Pies in their most basic form - known as 'Galettes' - originate from the Neolithic period (9500BC): where they were baked on hot coals.

8.) Strawberry Cheesecake

 

Originating from Greece. Cheesecake's earliest record is found in Marcus Porcius Cato's, 'De Re Rustica' (gastronomy book). Cheesecake is said to be served to athletes during the very first Olympic games held in 776BC.

 

9.) Chocolate Mousse

A 'modern' dessert. It wasn't until the 1960s that Chocolate Mousse became part of America and Britan's home cuisine: even though it's first record is 1892. Prior to this it was only a specialty in French restaurants.

10.) Chocolate Hazelnut Meringue (Gluten Free)

Another medieval dish, which was highly influential and seminal: as we see here. Meringue was first called 'White Biscuit Bread' in a handwritten book by Lady Elinor Fettiplace at around 1570.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Five Minutes with...

Five Minutes With....

Alana 'Beetle' Bourke 

 

 

This week Amy interviews young Alana. The comedienne of Coffee Fest, who is , ,  and don't ask...it's complicated!

 

Where does Beetle come from? Do you have any other nicknames?

Beetle comes from me being a really dorky kid and is fortunately the only nick name I've ever given myself. I get Lana and Lan and Lanie: but Lana's the current favourite :)

 

What is your favourite gelato milkshake?

Creme Brulee. I had a sip of one once and went on about it for an hour. Completely delicious. 

 

 Best thing about working at coffee Fest?

The rushes where you don't get to breathe for four hours because it's pumping so hard and you can't stop laughing cause the coffee machine comedy is going into overdrive.  

 

 What is the one chore you absolutely hate doing at Coffee Fest?

The back bench. No matter how ready I am it always get the better of me. 

 

First thing you bought with your own money?

 Sushi. And I think most of it has gone on sushi since :)

 

The world is ending in a week...what do you do?

 Drive.

 

What do you want to be when you grow up?

 An editor or some whacky designer or a travel blogger. 

 

 Have you got any hidden talents?

Don't think so :O 

 

 What song sums up your life?

 All I Want - Kodaline

 

You are stuck on a desert island with one person....who would you want it to be?

 

 Lana Del Ray. I reckon she would make it feel like an adventure, also she sings like an angel. 

Thanks for taking five with us Alana! That Crème Brulee milkshake sounds delicious...

 

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